The "To Do List"

There is a definite tendency to over think and plan.  We beat the proverbial horse in everything we do having become expert list makers. We've become an accumulation of great ideas that seem to go no where. We spend months, years and decades planning for the perfect conditions rather then improving what we can and enjoy what has been given. We decide to just do it already.

Get up everyday and commit to doing something. Spend each weekend becoming a project warrior and spend some hours with your children teaching them the benefits of home improvements. If the kids don't like the smell of trash take it out and to the curb. Consider how even the garbage is made possible because of our plenty and then how blessed we are that it is hauled far away. Attention to detail and time each day devoted to improving your physical space will not go unrewarded.

Devaluing the smaller doable changes is just a way of being lazy and resistant to taking  charge. We condition ourselves to ignore and eventually not to see the misplaced items the chipping paint or the toothpaste in the sink. We must watch for this desensitization which is the same operation that kicks in and we fail to see the homeless the hungry. We must raise awareness of our surroundings and the conditions of our life and of course our soul. We see but do not perceive we hear but to not listen. We turn a blind eye and then we incrementally slowly close ourselves off from more and more of our corner of the world.

Saint Anthony the Great understood that even the monks and nuns who have dedicated themselves to prayer can not lead a life where prayer is the sole activity; there must be labor. I am always amazed by the popular misconception that many laity have that the monastics withdraw from the work of urban life to attend church and pray. Consider the work that these oasis' in the deserts require. Maintenance is a part of every life or it should be. 

There is "the doing" that we must get done regularily to move through our day obviously but then there are those activities which are basically brainless the cabinet that needs tightening, the pictures that need hanging, or the weeds that won't wait. Completing these tasks can be calming because of their simplicity. They are equally rewarding as we are reminded throughout our day of how we made that small space better. We no longer avoid the cabinet or the flower bed or the unfinished wall.

There has been the growing impetus in this society to reward avoidance where it is seen as a badge of honor and menial chores are seen as tasks others are hired to do.   By taking ownership of our space and what needs to be done we enjoy the fruits of our labor and move through the private space in our home and yard recreating order and serenity in a personal way.

It is true that in the deepest sense the inner reality creates the outer form but ignoring or dismissing the outer reality is like ignoring that we are a spiritual creature with a body. We can apply this concept of doing small tasks regularly to change more subtle aspects to our inner life also. A small daily prayer will change our life being courteous to our neighbors or the clerks where we shop will provide a more relational experience.

These small changes will create the momentum which will set the stage for bigger and better changes. We will not be entrusted with more if we fail to be good stewards of what we have been given. If we don't care for our stuff our little treasures our selves we can't hardly expect others to.  So cense your house everyday, bless your children and paint the porch.

So get up and just get it done. Change your attitude about chores don't resist doing them don't resent having to clean up and fix up. See it as your pleasure and a concrete way of thanking God for the abundance of your life.  Tending to your personal space is not work it should not be equated with some kind of enslavement our material work.  You are privileged to have the opportunity to create a clean beautiful space in which you live.  We must remember it is our home wherever it is.  It is where we relax and make ourselves at home with our families. 

Do What You Can

The Serenity Prayer

God grant me

the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.

The courage to change the things I can.

And the wisdom to know the difference.

Subscribing to the notion of an internal locos of control is a powerful way to live. To maintain such a mindset and to function from that worldview is liberating as you carve out for yourself the life you want. In doing so we are limited only by a lack of creativity to contend with our internal ambivalence and external obstacles, challenges and opposing interests which seek to assert another agenda.

There are undeniable givens which are fixed like gender, birth order, race, citizenship, genetics  and intelligence which establish parameters and shape our identity. They are only the beginning of how we interface with the world and  more importantly with our Creator. None of these fixed characteristics of a person touch on the spirit of a person, the incorporeal essence or the eternal center of the human being.  These 'predetermined' or fixed variables may be compared with a rule book but does not speak to strategy or intent or desire.
 

Does this then mean that overwhelming adversity or strife negates the reality of an internal locus of control? Hardly, we hear about individuals overcoming what seems like impossible odds. Human trafficking, genocide, trauma, abuse, starvation and modern day slavery are no match for the human spirit and resolve. More then about changing such conditions it is very much out how we move through such adversity. In the United States there is a tremendous reservoir of untapped potential and resignation of the any personal initiative. Acceptance is confused with defeatism. As explored in other blog entries depression is endemic in the American society being largely a disease of affluence. The human spirit is stupefied and doped up on instant gratification and entitlements. 

I reject Calvin and his predestination along with Augustine and his ideas of human depravity. I deny emphatically the fatalism of determinism. As Orthodox Christians we strive to return to God and like the Prodigal we find the Father waiting to embrace us.

On the flip side yielding or submitting to an external locus of control ideology is a terrifying prospect where emancipated individuals are shackled,  lack the free will, volition or the ability to shape their lives.  By circumventing or more correctly exposing, the thin rhetoric of that poorly constructed paradigm which seeks to assert that we are little more then lab rats subject to the reflexive responses of behaviorism and determinism run amok; we can continue to be empowered.

By understanding the essentials of an internal locus of control we no longer have to live in a constant fear of deprivation or anxiety. We are able to harness the full force of our God given talents and use them to live securely and authentically. We can be good citizens by encouraging others to take control of their decisions and not to settle into the learned helplessness. By lending our 'ego' strength to others by showing empathy not sympathy (a fundamental distinction) and by our example of faith and fortitude we can show our neighbors how they too can be effective change agents in their own lives.

As we enforce our determination and augment our skill set those situations which seek to draw us away from our personal empowerment diminish and become the stepping stones beckoning us out to put our best foot forward. The conditions that exist beyond our control  are blessed and released as we partner with God.

More then accepting our limitations as givens we must accept our ability and the responsibility we have in shaping our community for the better. It is altruistic not self absorbed to embrace our unique abilities. It is the ultimate cop-out to live a life controlled by others. It is too empty to have an existence where we feel blown about by the tides of the day, by the whim of some, by the assertions of others who may not have our interest in mind.

We can take charge within our own lives and work collectively with our family to make life better. Our family can be a safe, loving fortress which is fortified by Christian values. All of our communications with extended family, friends and colleagues should be respectful, engaging and with the utmost of civility.

Journey v.s.Destination

I always thought that I was a destination driven person. Of course each of us are journeymen in this life enroute to the Promised Land where there is neither pain nor sorrow.  God's Grace has provided any and all hope to navigate the storm and make passage to the safe harbor. All hope of finding our way  is contingent on our willingness to engage with God and His Divine Revelation through a robust prayer life and the medicine offered us through Mysteria of  the Church. "It is not one's own efforts which lead to the goal, because without grace, efforts produce little. Nor does grace without effort bring what is sought, because grace acts in us and for us through our efforts." St. Theophan the Recluse

This past weekend I realized that I may not actually be a destination driven individual but a journeyman. During my marathon I realized that I don't like racing (to use the term very loosely). I have only ever enjoyed one organized event in 2005 which is why I almost never enter a road race. I'm not complaining about the team of volunteers or the traffic control or the enthusiasm from the crowds rather I resist what they seem to assert about the runner. It is true that it can be a helpful tool an objective assessment but of what actually?

 

Training is driven by the desire to go in and connect with God. Training provides the structure to engage the mind, body and soul in a consistent format. Running road races seems to cheapen the effort. It seems tht event running is more concerned with bragging rights then with the deeper matters of self and spiritual intergration.

 

The relaxed circumstance of training runs are wholly personal, relaxed and non judgmental. Once I start adding divisions and finishing times the fun and joy is sucked right out and running starts to be invaded by the status and economy of the rest of life. Judgment and ridicule abound in so many aspects of our life that it seems sad to sacrifice the sanctuary and respit of my runs for something as silly as a medal.

 

Performance based assessments tools like road races and events award accolades based simply on finishing times which are determined largely  by genetics, opportunity and training. I admire the grace and beauty of athletes who are blessed with the genetic genenius and the brilliance which shines from their hard work. It is wonderful to watch and is inspiring. I choose to look through a different prism one which gives promise and rewards my intent when paired with diligence. Even the ordinary can do extraordinary feats when engaged with God's Grace.

 

So to wind up this blog entry I know there are those  motivated by the arrival on the scene and others like myself who are more about the journey. Of course when the road to the destination presents challenges we all wish we could just get there already and just move the mountain.

Run for Religious Freedom Marathon Stats and Update

This was the most ambivalent training I've had. It was different then the first two marathon trainers in some very important ways. The only similarity between these three marathons was that each was dedicated to the Ecumenical Patriarch and the cause of Religious Freedom.

 Motivation is a difficult thing to fake and it was difficult at times to be excited about the process but I knew that in the end I would be better for doing it and would most likely seek to complete many more marathons through the years.


I will continue to offer the national team-in-training 16 week program free of charge to whomever was interested in Running for Religious Freedom. For future reference simply contact me decide on a race and I'll help you week to week. There were many people interested but few who were willing to take on the challenge themselves. Demetra P. is one who is training for her first marathon this April! This is just the beginning of Run for Religious Freedom and I am setting up my website and store to assist Orthodox Christians to get involved and to create a sense of community in the running world. For those of you who have been following my training and this cause I'll post the stats of this my third marathon dedicated to His All-Holiness and the Inaugural Event for the Run for Religious Freedom.


Cause: Run for Religious Freedom

Participant: Damianakis, Angela
Event: Walt Disney World Marathon Jan. 9, 2011
Female 42 yr. old

Distance: MARATHON 26.2 miles
Clock Time 4:27:32                             Chip Time 4:23:01
Overall Place 3702 / 13522                 Gender Place 1054 / 6267             Division Place 177 / 951
Age Grade 55.1%
5 Mile 48:12                                       10 Mile 1:37:30
Half Split 2:09:46                                20 Mile 3:18:42

O.K. everyone this wasn't a personal record but it is completed. Please know there is always another marathon to take our cause to the streets. Please remember to donate through Paypal (button on this blog) if you believe this a worthy cause.

Run for Religious Freedom Marathon 2011

Run for Religious Freedom Marathon 2011 in upon us. What I hope to accomplish with this inaugural event is to empower a grassroots effort and telegraph bodly the message: We are tenacious, dedicated and persistent. Although we live the world seas away, we care about religious freedom and the right of our spiritual leader the Ecumenical Patriarch to be afforded all civil and human rights endowed to each of us by our Creator.

Stepping out despite my weakness or inexperience will provide a most valuable tool. It has already changed how I approach challenges in life. This is faith: the gap between ability and accomplishment. This training, this basic running rule, has shown me how to apply Biblical principles in everyday life. In the end we all must ask ourselves whom do we really serve in our behavior, by our conduct, with our effort; there is where our heart is. So I'm will lace up and get moving!!!

I will Dig Deep and shake the lead out.

On Being Terminally Ill

There is a healthy way to be ill. Living only in terms of waiting on death is not living.  Even when given a "death sentence" dropping out of life is no way to spend the rest of one's time. It is the perfect opportunity to right wrongs,  repent, to find God now that you have been freed from the superficiality of this world.

Modification of daily functioning may be quite necessary and inevitable but resolving to die is not the point. Accepting the course and circumstance one can harness a resolve not found among most indulged with excellent health and opportunity.

Redefining long term goals and perceiving essentials beyond this mortal life can console, comfort and even motivate. Worry about a pension ten years off becomes insignificant and new emphasis can be placed on acceptance and love,  on forgiveness and faith. These after all are the real concerns the true preoccupations in life.

If desperation and fear kick in we can become obsessed with prolonging life beyond reasonable limits which can be misguided and fool hearty as death will find us all. Dying with dignity comes with living in understanding one's relationship to death and to life eternal. If you seek to save your life you will lose it.

Godspeed and My Magnum Opus *

Godspeed has traditionally been used as a farewell greeting to those embarking on a journey or voyage. It was intended to convey safe travel and goodwill. It has since been reduced to a polite expression of well wishes at the parting of company.

Godspeed however can invoke a much deeper spiritual goodwill offering that the traveler make his/her journey on God's terms. It can easily imply a pray that more then prosperity or good fortune that God is the captain of the journey. That the Lord establish the terms of the adventure and the pace of the travel. God is essentially in the driver's seat and He sets the course, the pace and the nature of what will be.

Suddenly Godspeed seems to be reminding us of the course of our life placing God in the center. Our goal is to allow our Lord to lead the way and for us to wait on Him when we wish to rush ahead and to push through our resistance when we wish to linger. We don't simply take God with us on our trips but rather we travel with Him.

With my Marathon (Run for Religious Freedom) just days away I have come to realize that the perfect race and pace is one in which I continue my grand adventure with God. I know it will be difficult, exhausting and even painful at times. These challenges are what I have been preparing for they are the ways in which I demonstrate my devotion to the Ecumenical Patriarchate and to the cause of Religious Freedom for all.

This course of running inward to make an outward expression more meaningful is what has worked for me. This well defined challenge and predetermined distance sets acceptable parameters tempered and measured discomfort. Oddly enough this arena where pain, self doubt and fatigue is commonplace becomes the reward for all the training logs. It is my Magnum Opus (Great Work). Actually it sounds almost too corny to write and in the spirit of humility I'll leave it on the written page.

Of course at the end of the day the key to success at the marathon or any great challenge is in the not minding that its gonna hurt, that's it, end of story.  Upon completion I will have learned a great deal more about myself and my direction. This has been the case in the past and I trust I will not finish without having spent all that I have on the course and thereby reaping all the benefit. The key to my success is Godspeed. It may be what drives tens of thousands of people to the very same challenge.